For the Love of Harvey…Unspeakable Joy!
Ghandi/October 2
Martin Luther King Jr./January 15
Cesar Chavez/March 31
Harvey Milk/May 22
These are special days. They are dedicated first to honor these individuals, their lives and their contribution to our world and our lives. Second, these days represent a call to learn and align ourselves with the spirit and intent of their work. We are each challenged to come forward and live it in our own way.
Ever since I was a child and well into adulthood, through stories my father told about Cesar, through the unforgettable words of Martin, and films about Ghandi and Harvey, I learned that while we may be disenfranchised within the dominant paradigm, we can be a peaceful, powerful and an undeniable presence for change. We are here. We belong. And yes! We, absolutely all of us, are powerful, beautiful, wise and worthy.
I have come to know this for myself in part because of the mere existence of these four people and the impact of their thought and work in the world. But how do I know about them? It is because of the specific attention given to them, the honor, the respect. I have learned their words and come to recognize their images in schools and libraries, public spaces and media. Through example they have taught me some of my most valuable lessons for being committed to my own true nature while living on this planet. They have honored me first. They have valued and reflected me in my worth. In my own much simpler way, I try to thank them and continue the flow of their beautiful intentions through my work, my life, my thoughts and words. They stand as my models.
This weekend, Matthew and I attended some of the events in our neighborhood for the first ever Harvey Milk Day. I say all the time how much I love living in our neighborhood, nestled between the Mission District, a largely Latino community and the Castro District, a largely gay community. I joke that we live in an alternate reality, just right for me! Living here provides relevant reflection, community awareness and a sense of being able to naturally relax into myself. Generally when I think about my life, I don’t feel that I have experienced the severe brunt of oppression. I feel blessed and fortunate. And yet, upon quieter reflection I recall that I and those I love have experienced verbal harassment, service refusal in restaurants, our home shot at, physical assault, property damage, stalked, threatened and disowned for being LGBTQI. I laugh at my own self. Oh yeah, that…that’s just life. But in recalling these memories, I remember how strong we are and how we continue to love and take the larger planetary lessons in stride and go on with our personal lives. It provides me a moment to think about what has contributed to our strength and our ability to endure. Even in our darkest moments none of us stand alone.
Saturday we stood on Castro Street in front of Harvey Milk’s former camera store and political headquarters. They dedicated a big bronze plaque and remembered the man, his work and his legacy. I look forward to it becoming a part of my life as I walk by it when I go to get bread and milk at the store. Harvey Milk was the first openly gay man to be elected to public office in California. His presence and his courage changed the face of the LGBTQI movement across the United States and he is credited for helping to defeat Proposition 6/known as the Briggs Initiative. The proposed law would have made firing gay teachers—and any public school employees who supported gay rights—mandatory. He was a strong and brave man who was assassinated in 1978, 10 months after taking office. In 2009 he was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom.
Harvey Milk encouraged us to come out and give face to our community. Let people see that we are here. We are everywhere. We become strong by simply acknowledging our being. It strengthens us to claim our presence in the world, and it allows others to see that we are their neighbors, friends, family members, co-workers, role models, teachers, etc… Harvey said, “It takes no compromising to give people their rights. It takes no money to respect the individual. It takes no survey to remove repressions.”
Stuart Milk, Harvey Milk’s nephew, thinks his uncle would be honored by all the various events and tributes, but he also stressed the importance of using Harvey Milk day to unite all marginalized minorities rather than simply being about gay rights or one man. “It’s still a hard concept for people to get,” Stuart Milk said. “This isn’t about having a Harvey Milk curriculum in every school. It’s an opportunity to talk about what discrimination means and why it’s important for everyone to feel included.”
I was happy to read Stuart Milk’s words. As a Chicana, I believe it is important for us to recognize our common experience and our common goal as “marginalized minorities.” To oppress one is to oppress all…I also know that TO UPLIFT ONE IS TO UPLIFT ALL! I think of the children first, all of the children who over the last 30 years have had LGBTQI teachers in the classroom. I believe very strongly in the importance of seeing ourselves reflected in our world. Harvey said: “All young people, regardless of sexual orientation or identity, deserve a safe and supportive environment in which to achieve their full potential.”
The statistics for LGBTQI youth are staggering. They are some of our most at risk children with numbers estimated at more than 3 million. Suicide, homelessness, substance abuse and other high risk coping mechanisms occur due to our society’s lack of education and support regarding LGBTQI awareness. The Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network (GLSEN) conducts a survey every two years on school climate with regard to LGBT students. Findings from the 2007 survey include the following:
- 74% of students often or frequently heard homophobic remarks at school
- 86% of LGBT students report being verbally harassed
- 22% report being physically assaulted
- 61% of harassed or assaulted students did not report the incident to school staff, feeling that nothing would be done or the situation would worsen
- 31% who did report incidents to school staff said that staff did nothing in response (GLSEN, 2008)
I am happy to know that across California and in 20 other states Harvey Milk Day was celebrated, in schools, libraries, public venues, community centers and more. Harvey said, “Hope will never be silent.” Wait a minute. What’s that? In the distance? I hear a song coming on…
In my imagination I am dancing on Castro Street with thousands of others, all color, all preference, all people, all being. We are one body, one heart, one spirit– moving, singing, celebrating! The song Unspeakable Joy fills the air, fills our body. We are one. Miraculously, I see Harvey in the crowd and I smile as I dance toward him. He is an old man. Now a fabulous 80! He is dancing. His spirit alive! Harvey! We are free! We are all free, I call out to him! We dance and we sing in the truth and the knowing that we are free, we are free to be exactly who we are at heart, at the core of our being! Thank you for the dance Harv! Let’s dance some more! I feel the hope coming on and there’s no end in sight!
Unspeakable Joy(this song came on as I was writing this post)
People ask me why this supernatural high
Seeing only sun when there’s a cloudy sky
I know the trouble tries to surround me
But I’ve been given something greater deep inside me
I did not get it from any woman or man
And it’s okay if they don’t always understand
It’s very easy to get caught in circumstance
It’s even easier to break out in a dance
Joy, unspeakable joy
‘Cause they did not give it, they cannot take it away
Joy, unspeakable joy
In my heart and I can’t let them steal my JOY
(click play button to listen to this song and join me for a moment in the dance. We are all dancing. We are all one!)
(If you have any trouble with the previous play button links or the song cuts off, use this player directly above or click on the actual underlined link to view in a new page or play via itunes – NOTE: if you press one of the play buttons and then scroll away from it, the song will likely stop playing.)
Note from Matthew: Today is my dad’s birthday, it seems fitting that this post comes on this day. Another Gemini just like Harvey. So, I dedicate this song to him, a guy who has always taught me about the joy of following your heart and to dance like there’s no tomorrow. Happy Birthday Dad!! Dance it up till you can dance no more!!! We love you!
Filed under LGBTQI Families, Power of Reflection | Tags: celebration, courage, family, festive, fun, lgbt, reflection | Comment (0)
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